January 4, 2012

H2O hooooooe

I posted on my tumblr. It's about drinking water...kinda boring, but I might as well put it on here. Sober night #3. Gooooood job. Plus, you get to see me quasi-fat. 

One of the main (and easiest) ways to stay healthy is to drink water. I don't know how the hell I survived prior to discovering how integral water was (is) to being healthy. I remember all throughout middle and high school, I constantly had a decaying taste in my mouth because I was so hungry and thirsty all the time. Gross huh?

My friend vaGINA turned me onto the wonders of water in college. We would toke in her car and she insisted that I chug the gallon of water that was always on the floor of her passenger's side. She's a little naggy so I yielded but from that point on, you would NEVER find me without a water bottle.  

I drink at least two 32 oz of water a day. If you don't know, that's about two of those Nalgene water bottles that white people carry around. Any less, my pee will be dark yellow. cloudy and smelly. *shudders*

When I first started drinking lots of water. I could not stop peeing. I doubt I drank as much as I do now, but over time, I think my body got used to it. Throughout the day, drinking 64 oz of water, I only pee about 4-7 times (also depending on whether I drink coffee or not). So it's not like I'm always on the loo. It's totally doable...plus it feels so damn refreshing...especially a glass of ice water...especially a glass of ice water while doing cardio. For some reason, when I drink tepid water during an intense cardio workout, I feel like barfing.  

Here are the reasons why I think water is so fucking important. I might gank some 'facts' from other sources as I run out of my own reasons... I will cite these.

  • Water prevents headaches- Whenever you get a headache for no reason, like you're not hungover or about to start your period, you're probably hungry or dehydrated. Drink water. 
  • Putting water into your body is kind of like when you flush the toilet after taking a shit- it flushes all the gunky shit out of your body. What do you think shit and piss is? Waste....that water greatly aids in getting rid of. Is that grammatically correct? Meh.
  • On that note, a lot of foods have a lot of sodium in them... you wouldn't even know. Unfortunately, Asian foods have a lot of sodium... American food, generally being unhealthy and processed, has lots of sodium in there too. Drink water... it'll flush it out. Think about when you eat an entire bowl of pho or can of chicken soup. You get thirsty within the hour right? That's cuz the sodium is sucking all the water from your body and doing some crazy shit with it. Drink water...flush it out. You know how you go swimming in the ocean and your lips feel fucking weird? That's cuz the salt sucked up all the moisture in your lips and now it's like grandma's lips. Drink water. 
  • People wonder why my skin is so clear--a characteristic I can boast about that. I rarely have pimples or back-ne. I feel like that's because water stabilizes the oils or whatever makes you break out everywhere. Obviously I'm lacking research in this but I really think drinking water makes your skin clear and supple. Fuck Proactiv.
  • Water cures hangovers. Want my remedy for hangovers? I'm a connoisseur of battling them. You drink your alcoholic drink alongside a cup of water allllll night long. If you binge, you wake up around 7, down two tylenols and a huge glass of water, sleep two or more hours, wake up and drink water throughout the day. Voila... hangover gone by 2pm. (This is assuming you've drank A LOTTTTTT). It also helps if you eat something greasy but delicious. Sorry, but munching on carrots and cabbage is the last thing you want to eat when you're hungover. 
  • Water helps you feel full so you don't end up stuffing your face. Whenever I'm eating, I'm drinking throughout my meal. My relatives, being Korean and overly superstitious, say that it's bad for you to drink water intermittently during your email. Disagree. Drinking before and during makes you full. It might not be optimal for digestion...who  knows? If you want to avoid over-eating, drink water. 
  • If you drink water all the the time, you won't have any space or desire to drink healthy's nemesis #1.... CARBONATED/JUICY BEVERAGES. Ohmg...this morning, I caught a snippet of a morning talk show where the DJs were talking to a girl who was addicted to Diet Coke. I could just imagine this bitch, all fat, leaning on her desk with her can of soda next to her, on the phone, hankering for her next cigarette. If you ever come across people who are addicted to diet sodas (particularly girls who drink them), they are usually fat and lead unhealthy lives. Diet sodas taste so artificial to me...like if those hoes from The Hills were able to get reborn as a drink, they would be Diet Coke...with their fake, syrupy voices. Gross. God, I sound so negative. But I fucking hate sodas, flavored water, blah blah blah. JUST DRINK WATER. 
Okay.. I could write more, but I feel like I've ranted enough. My fingertips are freezing, my bedtime is encroaching, and I have to go over the read aloud I'm doing tomorrow for my asshole students.

Good night!


Oh! The reason I wrote this post tonight is because I ate an entire bowl of pho, drinking all its contents because it was homemade and does not contain MSG so I trust it. I also drank two big glasses of water. At the end of it all, I had a huge water baby in my stomach. I took a picture of it because it literally looks like I'm in my second trimester. It's scary.

Remember that commercial for the water baby toy? It's my water baby!


  1. You're post just reminded me I need to drink more water today.
    I couldn't agree with you more on how important water is, soda and flavored water are fucking disgusting! I dont understand how people can drink like three cans a day.

  2. Hi Ira,
    So I've been inspired by you and have been trying to drink a gallon of water a every day and it has made such a difference! My skin looks 100 times better within two days and I don't even need to wear foundation anymore.yay for clear pee!